The Reluctant Success

May 20, 2010 at 8:34 pm 6 comments

In following with the current popularity of the Law of Attraction I am writing this as if I am a success, not the halting, undisciplined writer that I am.  I mean was. 

I had the worst possible childhood for a writer…a reasonably idyllic Midwestern childhood of riding bikes on country roads, Kids’ Day with parades, ferris wheels (yes, I could see my house from the top), and painted store windows, a popcorn stand on the corner, and yes, fresh sweetcorn from my grandmother’s farm and tomatoes from the garden.   Did I mention scaring pigs and watching their cute little back-ends race across a field?

If you’re looking for a dark side to this, it would be my brother providing most of the entertainment, throwing up strawberry shortcake from the top of the Octopus, that stomach churning up-down-swing you around amusement ride, or splitting open his knuckles on his rusty bike fender, or knocking himself silly when the metal seat of the swing whacked him on the back of the head.  That one got me out of my piano lesson and straight to the doctor’s waiting room.  The biggest suspense in my life was what was going to happen to him next.

Life was pretty easy…school was fun and I got good grades without trying too hard, learned the piano despite doing it my way instead of my teacher’s way, got into the college I wanted, didn’t die from being stupid, my periods were easy, childbirth was easy (well at least I forgot the worst parts), and now what?  What did I learn?  Well, it certainly wasn’t  how to push myself through the boring parts of life, to struggle to get ahead, to really work for a dream.  I mean, why?  I could be pretty happy and content mosey-ing through life, accomplishing a certain amount, a little travel, good jobs more meaningful than well paid, living in a pretty home in a pretty town.  But.

But now what?  I’m at the age where easy isn’t good enough, I get to put my dreams first rather than those of my kids or my husband, or anyone.  I have a small window of time before I need to start putting priorities to my parents needs, so I need to get going.  But how? 

Being an avid collector of quotes from Bartlett’s to The Portable Curmudgeon and every self-help book on a shelf, I have a million bits of good advice, inspiring, cajoling, sassy, wise, and not one of them will kick me in the rear and get me going.  Not long term at least. Only I can do that, and I’m not very good at it.  I know how many times Edison tried to invent the lightbulb, how many rejections William Kennedy recieved before getting Ironweed published, and that failure is mandatory (What! No one told me that when I was growing up!). 

And so my research begins, corraling the resources and supports around me, to believe my friends when they say, “I’d read that” about my book idea, gather my books and advice givers, and yes, you’re right, Karen Lamb, ” a year from now you may wish you had started today.”  I know, I know.

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Entry filed under: Coaching, Life, Personal, Writing. Tags: , , , , .

Rethinking Ballpark Contained Abandon

6 Comments Add your own

  • 1. Claudia  |  May 22, 2010 at 10:14 pm

    This is really beautiful 🙂 I think you’d make a very fine writer.

    Reply
    • 2. ericahostetler  |  May 23, 2010 at 9:02 am

      thanks! now all I have to do is keep it up!

      Reply
  • 3. Jamie  |  May 31, 2010 at 11:48 am

    This is so beautifully written. You’d make a great writer!

    Reply
    • 4. ericahostetler  |  June 1, 2010 at 10:09 am

      Thank you – I’ll take all the encouragement I can get! I read several of your blogs…nice! Good luck with the “getting on with your life.” It’s really fun finding yourself. I was surprised once, as an adult daughter, how easy it is to slip into the parent/child relationship, no matter how old you are. It took some concentrated effort to be an adult with my parents.
      cute bird, too.
      Best,
      Erica

      Reply
  • 5. Lucia Sciore  |  June 20, 2010 at 7:41 am

    Rica, This is great! and you did “start today”…..Looch

    Reply
    • 6. ericahostetler  |  June 22, 2010 at 3:04 pm

      Did I email back and say thanks? I saw that you subscribed, too – now the pressure is on! I am proud of myself that I started today. Each and every day….I hope!

      Reply

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